Weekend Update

Ever been kissed by a large, friendly Blue & Gold Macaw? Well, let me tell you, it is not an experience you will soon forget.

Here's how the story goes:

Remember that on Saturday I was approached by my birdy friends to rescue a lovely blue Indian ringneck in Lubbock. The bird was not accompanied by any accessories, so I asked Jeff, a fellow bird lover and rescuer, if he had a cage I could borrow. And, of course, he did. I slip over to the units' house for some grub and movie while waiting for the call to come get the cage.

Oh, this is where it gets good...

Get the call from Jeff just as Mom is telling Joey exactly how to insert the DVD, if ya know what I mean. I pop over to Jeff's and arrive to find Jeff and Tommy getting ready to feed and having a relaxing conversation outside. Tommy is sporting BeBe, a large Blue & Gold Macaw on his shoulder. BeBe is a beautiful and friendly large bird and I am just brimming with excitement to hold her. Tommy assures me no prob and she swiftly climbs to my arm. I am admiring her beautiful head, amazingly strong feet and sweet demeanor. In fact, I am caught off guard as she strains and leans in for a big birdy smooch.

OK, now it gets REALLY good!

I am no stranger to parrot spit and am delighted that she is taking to me so quickly. So I, too, lean in for a big, wet, sloppy one and everything is just ducky. UNTIL, she decides that my bottom lip needs a little "plumping." She swiftly grabs said labia twixt pointy upper and flat, sharp lower beaks, gives a good hard pinch and then shrugs off with a sly look. I am stunned and think this is not too bad for my first macaw bite (these birds pack a whopping 900 PSI in those beaks - enough to sever a finger like butter). Tommy asks if she has bitten and I reply it was just a love bite. He gently admonishes her while I stand there beginning to feel the pain. I want to be "cool" so I ignore the bite and continue nattering on with Tommy. As I blather away I notice a curious look on Tommy's face and he suddenly asks if I would like a paper-towel. Meanwhile, I have the sensation that my lip is approaching Angelina Jolie size. Jeff brings me something to dab with and I realize that as I was blithering on, blood was crazily creeping down my chin. PRETTY!

Oh, the humiliation!

With swift goodbyes and apologies all around, I head home leaving my pride somewhere in the gutter. Arriving home, I am pleased to see that the movie is playing and the room is dark. I slip into my seat and watch the quite lovely British film, "Calendar Girls." Movie finishes, lights go up and to my chagrin ol' Mom has already figured out the state of my lower lip. Joey is delighted to see a hugely swollen lip sporting two neat little pinch marks.

Ok, now I want to crawl away.

We all laugh about it. I go home ecstatic about my first parrot on the morrow and I photograph the evidence.